Sports Schmortz

I'm no good at sports-related posts because I don't watch sports. So when I was forwarded this MSNBC celeb/athlete look-a-like link, I was filled with ire happy to browse through it. Some are bang on (Cal Ripken Jr. & Steve Wilcos), some are waaaay off (Daniela Pestova & Anna Kournikova) and some could use a little help. So here are my alterna-faces.

MSNBC said: Khalil Green looks like Owen Wilson.

Face Detective said: A baseball cap does not a twin make! Khalil looks like moody actor, Ben Foster.

MSNBC said: Tony Kukoc looks like Hugh Jackman.

Face Detective said: Have you gone cuckoo for Kucok, MSNBC? He looks like former Prison Break star turned manslaughterer, Lane Garrison.

MSNBC said: Shaun White (skateboarder on the right) looks like Rupert Grint (Ron Weasley).

Face Detective said: How dare ye besmirch the good name of my favourite Harry Potter character, MSNBC! Shaun is so obviously twins with pre-face-surgery Carrot Top.

Facial Profiling

You know the story about the Harvard Prof. who got arrested for breaking into his own house? Well feast your eyes upon the cop and the guy who'll play him in the made-for-tv movie - Entourage's very own Napoleon, Kevin Connolly. 

Aaaaand here's another angle of Kevin Connolly for your viewing pleasure. 

Wife Swaap

What's scarier than the little girl in the movie Orphan? How about Orphan star, Vera Farmiga's single-white-femaling of Maggie Gyllenhaal? It's creepy because Vera's onscreen hubby, Peter Sarsgaard, is Maggie's real life hubby. 

Not helping my hunch that Vera wants a piece of Peter? This picture. Lucky for Maggie, Vera will have to change her name to "Veera Faarmiga" if she wants in on the Gyllenhaal-Sarsgaard vowel paarty. 

C.O.P.S. - Bad Guys Edition - Part I

C.O.P.S. was a great after-school cartoon. There were clearly defined good guys v. bad guys (Ratzinger would approve) and I'm almost positive the voice of City TV does the theme song. A few posts back, I cast Big Boss so I'll move right along to the rest of the crew. 

Rock Krusher: This beefy monster will be played by his human counterpart, football star turned "actor", Vinne Jones. Or as I like to call him, "Scene Krusher". 

Beserko: I had a tough time choosing between Dolph Lundgren and Gary Busey. But as the wiki page insists, Beserko's defining feature is: "his gross incompetence and overall stupidity", so I went with Dolph. 

Miss Demeanor: When my nine year old self figured out her name was a play on "misdemeanor", I was BLOWN AWAY by the cleverness. Wiki describes M.D. as having "an ugly looking face like a witch" (whoa, someone has an issue with strong women) and while I don't think this description is true of Illeana Douglas, there is no denying their twinship. 

Sartorial Twinsies: Part Tres

The Da Vinci Cloak: My only quesiton is - why don't more women dress like murderous albinos? And no, this isn't Martha Plimpton in hooded garb, it's just some Germanic chick from The Sartorialist. 

Mumm-ra Rides Again: This one's going out to all the Thundercats fans... What would happen if you spackled some flesh onto Mumm-ra's face and added Ozzy's hair? 

Behold, Mumm-zy ! The ozzspring (ha!) of Ozzy and Mumm-ra! 

He's a Magic Man

Chris Klein was hilarious as the dummy jock in Election. But since 1999, his career and hairstyles (see here, here and OMG here!) seem to have gone downhill. So, if and when it gets really bad, he can always get gigs impersonating Vegas magician Lance Burton. 

But first he's gotta master the whole forcing-a-dove-to-perch-on-your-shoulder and make-it-look-like-they-like-it trick. Which will be a no-brainer for Chris who was able to do the exact same thing with Katie Holmes and Ginnifer Goodwin. 

Sartorial Twinsies: Part Deux

Here are some more look-a-likes care of The Sartorialist...  As always, impersonators on the left, real celebs on the right. 

Family Face Ties: Look everyone, it's Mallory Keaton out and about in Milan! No, not really - it's just your average beautiful Italian who looks exactly like the girl I wanted to look like my whole life. Jealous emoticon. 

Ally McWheels: And here we have an RDJ impersonator biking around Manhatten - no doubt hoping someone will ask for his autograph so he can say: "Can't you see I'm talking on the phone and riding my bike?!" And then Page Six can officially declare him an a-hole.

A-rrroooo! Teen-Wolves of America

Remember Teen Wolf the cartoon series? You better... (as I shake my fist menacingly at the computer). It was based on the 80s movie starring Michael J. Fox about a teen (Scott Howard) struggling to fit "in" with the "in crowd" alls-the-while hiding his werewolfishness. My fave character was Scott's best friend, Stiles, who thought he was fast with the ladies and cool with the lines, when he totally wasn't. Stiles is also twins with the Apple geek, coincidence? NOT!

Sartorial Sistah's in Arms... and Faces!

Here are some more kooky-fashioned folk from The Sartorialist and their celebrity twins: 

Mary Potter:  Ooooh, when Voldemort finds out Harry's got a sister, there is going to be truh-uh-bull!

Smallmouth Bass:  Introducing... Chuck Bass' kid sister, Chuckista Bass (don't believe me? Just check out her bow-tie!). Get ready for round two of the Battle for Bass Industries! Winner takes ascot!

Sartorial Twinsies: Part 1

The Sartorialist is a fantastic fashion blog that showcases stylish people milling around various fashion capitals. It is also a wealth of celeb look-a-likes. Take "Milano Tobey Maguire" here for instance - really, it's not Tobey, it's his Italian cousin, Antobey (see his full outfit here).  

Next up, we have a french dude (yes, dude) parading around Paris masquerading as Juliette Binoche! Watch out for Jeremy Irons! 

Fan Drawing: Fire Starter Walk With Me

If you've never searched "Fan Drawings" on the internet, now's a good time to start - they are hilarious and always, always, always way off base. Most of the time they end up looking nothing like the star and more like the deranged baby of two other celebrities. So... Ever wonder what would happen if Firestarter Drew Barrymore and scary Bob from Twin Peaks had a baby? 

Behold! A fan drawing of Emma Watson as Hermione!

Lost in Your Eyes and New Nose

Oh, Debbie Gibson! I know you were going for Gwen Stefani with that plastic surgery of yours, but you accidentally went all Haylie Duff! Which is rather unfortunate because Haylie Duff doesn't even want to look like Haylie Duff. 

The Pains of Being Selma and Bai

I've been listening to The Pains of Being Pure at Heart since the spring, and while I like the album well enough, I really, really, really like the fact that the girls on the cover look exactly like...

... Selma Blair and Bai Ling!

Bonus Jonas

I always knew Nick Jonas (swoon!) had a face twin but it took one year and one July issue of Vanity Fair for me to finally figure it out that NJ's twin is...

...Fran Lebowitz! Who, it turns out, isn't related to Annie Leibovitz at all! All these years I've been thinking to myself, "Those Leibovitz's are definitely my favourite famous sisters!" but now I realize I was living a lie (no thanks to Annie and Fran who've never publicly admitted they aren't blood). Welcome back, Bronte, Mitford and Simpson sisters!

Game, Set... Cash!

Federer may have taken Wimbledon, but Nadal is still tops in my book. And while there is something horrifically eager about Cash Warren's face (J-Alba's hubby on the left), he is pretty twinsies with Rafael Nadal. 

Drew Benet Ramsey

On the left, Drew Barrymore. On the right, a waaaaaay too grown-up looking toddler-model giving some majorly adult 'tude.  

Pssst, mini Drew - Right Said Fred has some advice for your parents:  "Your child's too sexy for her shirt, too sexy for her shirt, so sexy it's majorly inappropriate!" 

Re-Cast: The Sopranos - Take 2

Here are some more Sopranoriffic re-casts... 

Richie Aprile: Remember Richie? The psychopath who liked to hit people with cars and makeout with Janice while pointing a gun at her head (which I really can't blame him for)?Anyhoo, Richie also looks a whole lot like Schneider the Handyman from One Day at a Time. 

Big Pussy Bonpensiero: Big Pussy and Big Boss from the 80s cartoon C.O.P.S. are twins. Also, Big Boss is strangling a cat in this picture which is kinda timely...

Janice Soprano: Oh Janice, you and your terrible taste in men have so much in common with Hurley and his fatso dumb-dumb-ness. 

Direct TV Twinsies

I am pretty addicted to rottentomatoes.com and as such, see these two faces on a regular basis. They're the hosts of rotten tomatoes tv and for the longest time, I thought it was just a pic of John Krasinksi and Mandy Moore.

Behold, the Direct TV Twinsies!

Jolie times Three!

It seems the Jolie-Haven-Voights have a long lost sibling and his name is Jackson Rathbone (Jasper from Twilight). I bet Angie can't wait to properly welcome Jackson to the clan with a big, wet brotherly french!