Callin' Colin Firth

I would be lying if I said Rick Hilton was ever very far from my mind. Ditto for Firth. And it just so happens Paris' dad and Mr. Darcy are twinsies.

Cruisin' for a California Dreams Bruisin'

I didn't watch California Dreams as much as Saved By the Bell, but I definitely preferred CD because the actors were way prettier (Kelly Kapowski? No thanks. Kelly Packard? Yes please!). My crush was of course on Sly - the smooth-talking, weasly one whose diabolical money-making schemes made Zack Morris look like a guileless baby. Too bad for Michael Cade's career that he's twins with Tom Cruise.

The cast of California Dreams recently appeared on Jimmy Fallon and they all looked like a bunch of weathered, sad sacks (except for sweet Kelly, that is). It was depressing. It was very similar to this year's Oscars when they paraded the Brat Pack onstage and Judd Nelson looked like he had terminal something. Ditto for the 1995 Academy Awards when they rolled out a post-stroke Kirk Douglas. Made me feel sad and gross. Like midget wrestling.

Happy Holy Thursday everyone! Yes, even to you Barrabus, you filthy isurrectionaire, you.