Dark Crystals on the Pores of my Face

What do you mean, (SIGH) "another Dark Crystal post? What is this, Dark Crystal Week?" Yeah, it is. It's Dark Crystal Week, okay? There I said it. God!

What happened to Paul Simon's face? I mean, I was never "ooh, it's Paul Simon, someone get an ice bucket for my loins" but now he looks like a mythical androgynous creature. He appears to have smoothed his face down with a sander and made his lips magically disappear (coincidentally one of the many talents possessed by mythical androgynous creatures. Also the ability to turn groin areas into plastic Ken doll parts and giving babies unisex names like Kelly). Somewhere out there, Art Garfunkel is rubbing his ginger hands together with glee. Finally, Art's the hot one!

Thanks to Lisa for helping me connect the face twin dots.